LONG after I had retired to my bed following an extensive boozeday Tuesday, it appears the Prince of Darkness and his hordes were out and about in the wilds of Roath, feasting on young students.
The story reaches me that Roberts, a stranger to these late-night excursions, was dragged along by that ne'er-do-well trio the Prince, the wonderful Withers and Danny Boy (the poipes, the poipes).
In fact, the latter mentioned reprobate is beginning to resemble the kind of creature of the night you would expect to be in the company of his Royal Darkness. Danny Boy's sideburns seem to be creeping ever further down his face. He is looking a bit like Jack Nicholson in Wolf and I fear it won't be long before his face is hidden behind a mass of black, curling hair.
Anyway, apparently Roberts and the vagrants, all far well dressed for the Royal George, were accosted by a number of young females. Danny Boy even managed to scrounge a student card off one of them to take advantage of the cheaper beer deals.
It was Roberts, though, who scooped the jackpot with two students hanging on his every word. I'm not sure how many times he told them that he was "Wales No 1 rugby writer" but according to witnesses it had the desired affect. As far as he could remember, there names were Mel and Kim. It was left to me to remind him that Mel and Kim were actually a pop duo from the 80s who released such classic hits as "Aint never gonna be respectable". Sums up Roberts to a t, I think you'll find.
Next day there is an e mail from this student double act, claiming that Roberts can get them free publicity for a sporting project they are launching, sponsorship and a one-on-one discussion with the Welsh Rugby Union's chief executive. Oh, what some people will do for a bit of female attention.
Withers, meanwhile, is having what Sir Alex Ferguson once described as "Squeeky Bum time". He now realises that his decision to volunteer to give a seminar on journalism and politics to a bunch of Sheffield University students was a wee bit optimistic. The Wonderful One's writer and broadcaster label, which he has given himself, is sure to be tested to the limit.
He has discovered that not only will he be appearing with such luminaries as Radio Five's head of talent and a top bod from the Associated Press and Reuters, but he will also have to speak for one whole hour! Not only that but he has discovered that what he thought would be a cosy little classroom tutorial will be in the main Sheffield lecture auditorium, with podium and all, in front of a crowd of 200.
Knowing how he pulled out of a five-minute stand-up comedy routine one wonders what excuse he can find to dig himself out of this hole.
On Monday I cooked the famous Italian Sunday Gravy from my Sopranos cookbook, and had the various meats with some wholemeal pasta and sauce. I make this in the biggest saucepan I can find because any leftover gravy can be used for Lasagne or baked ziti recipes.
To make the gravy you first brown two spare rib chops in olive oil, remove them and then brown two veal steaks, remove them and then brown four Italian sausages. Finally remove them then put in four squashed cloves of garlic until they go brown, discarding them after that. Add a 1/2 cup of tomato puree and stir around for a minute. When that has mixed with the olive oil and meat juices, add a giant tin of tomatoes and two smaller ones and a cup of water, return the meats to the pan, add six ripped up basil leaves then bring to the boil. Cover and simmer for two hours then take some of the sauce, mix with the pasta and some grated Parmisan, then put on a plate and serve with the spare ribs and the veal. Top off with more Parmisan and some chilli flakes. Lovely.