Wednesday, August 27, 2008

Posh nosh

Posh and Becks turned up at The Yard last night to break the news. No, they aren't tying the knot as far as I am aware but Posh is moving up to join her partner in the big Smoke. They are going to live Sarf of the river and she will commute to Whitehall - yes, Whitehall! - in her new job. Best of luck, I say. No doubt the paparazzi has already been alerted to the reunion of the glamorous couple.
Meanwhile, Withers spent some time of his own in the capital at the weekend and had a rather strange experience on the platform at Victoria Station.
Before you ask: No, it didn't involve rent boys and a fiver.
What actually happened was that Withers spotted Wathanovski on the platform. At least, he was convinced it was Wathanovski. The bloke looked the spitting image but when the Wonderful One got closer he heard Wales' top soccer writer saying: "Anyway mate oi was walking down the apple n pairs and appened to glimpse me trouble n strife with..." You get the picture, broad cockney. The wonderful One was stunned.
But it got me thinking. Perhaps, just perhaps, the boy Wathanovski has been putting on his Welshness for public consumption. Maybe he's a lag escaped from Wormwood Scrubs who spends his weekends 'alf inching people's watches and loose change on various London stations.
More likely, though, is that this was Wathanovski's long lost twin and that they were both conceived within earshot of Bow Bells but someone stole Wathanovski from his carry cot outside the Royal London and spirited him away across the border.
Bare with me, the clues are there. The boy Wathanovski supports Spurs, for starters, even though he also expresses his undying love for Swansea. He's also been noticed sneaking off to eat jellied eels on his lunchbreak.
Um, well, alright, I made that bit up.
But mark my words, the truth can be stranger than fiction.

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