Thursday, August 24, 2006

Dolcellate Gnocci with pancetta and mushroom

Just when I think I'm showing my educated, debonaire side I make a terrible food fopah. What's worse it is Withers that picks me up on it and the word debonaire should never be used in the same sentence as him.
Anyway, in the Yard again Wednesday night after work and we're discussing food. I ponder aloud whether Withers still uses the panini maker that someone bought him as a present.
To put this into context, Withers waxed lyrical about this for a week and then... nothing. So I ask the question: "Do you still eat Paninis?"
"It's not Paninis. That's the plural. It's panini," lectures Withers.
Then what's the singular. "Panino," he preens proudly.
Well, disbar me Delia, wallop me with a wok, Worrall-Thompson - I never knew that.
Anyway, three pints later I don't feel much like cooking and the original plan, which involved chopping lots of veg and keeping a regular eye on things has gone out of the window.
Manchester United are on the telly, too, so I don't want to spend too long in the kitchen.
So to the bottom cupboard, the emergency cupboard where things like hotdog sausages in a jar lurk ready to bail me out.
And there it is. The vacuum-packed Gnocci.

Bring water to boil in a saucepan. Cut open the Gnocci and put into the pan. Meanwhile pre-heat oven to mark 6 (or mark 4 if like my oven it tends to burn things when you put them on the recommended level).
Boil until the little Italian pasta potatoes rise to the surface.
Put them into casserole dish and cut Dolcellate cheese over the top, add about 1/4 pint of double cream. Add lots of black pepper if you like it.
Put in oven and leave for 20 minutes. Worth probably stirring occasionally.
Meanwhile, fry up bits of bacon, or pancetta last night cos I forgot to take bacon out of fridge, with mushrooms.
Serve up after 20 minutes, sprinkling bacon bits or pancetta over top with mushroom.
If you're Withers and don't like meat JUST LEAVE THE BACON OUT!
At this stage I also sprinkle with parmesan and chilli flakes.
Once eaten, blob out in front of footie.
Warning: This is very, very filling. You can have a side dish of salad if you wish but, as those modern prophets the Simpsons say, "You don't make friends with salad". ta, ta.


Matt Withers said...

Rippers, it's 'faux pas', not 'fopah'.

Although there is a beautiful irony in incorrectly spelling faux pas.

Normal Mouth said...

Congratulations. You are officially the millionth journalist to launch a blog detailing the mundane in order to satirise blogging.

Personally, I never get bored of it. Your blog is, however, rather similar to a colleague on the Western Mail who - hilariously - blogged about his packed lunch.