WE journos like to think we have a good vocabulary, but a new word emerged last night that left a table of us totally baffled as to its meaning.
"Has anyone made yer schwun?" asked The Boss in all seriousness. There was a sea of blank faces around the table until one brave minion piped up. "What?"
"Ye know... Schwun!" he said a bit louder, with a longer emphasis on the Schhh.
The same blank sea of faces peered back and you could see it was irritating the wee man, I mean Boss. He decided to give it one last go...
"Schhwuuun, you know like a geerl makes ya schhwuun."
Hmm. At least he sounded a bit more Irish then - geerl came out as Father Jack might pronounce it in that Irish comedy classic "Father Ted". You know Father Jack, the old drunken priest in the corner who wakes up just long enough to say "driiink" and "geerls".
Still, it wasn't registering. I noticed out of the corner of my eye Withers attempting to sneak a look into his bag, just in case he had an Irish/Scots dictionary containing English translations. The Boss was now almost red in the face in his attempts to get through to his seemingly deaf audience. He decided to give it one more go. "Ye nay, when ye see a geerl for the forst time and yer heart thumps and ye are mesmerised."
And the penny suddenly dropped. "Ah," said the bravest of our number, hoping that he had finally got to the bottom of this most pertinent of all questions. "... You mean swoon!"
The boss's face lit up (if it could light up any more), he jumped to his feet and shouted with unbridled glee "Yeeeeeeees, Scccccchhhhwuuuun!"
"No", we all said in unison.
He looked a wee bit crestfallen as he left the pub.