Monday, July 07, 2008

The perfect dunking biscuit

I MUST admit I felt a bit out of my depth on Friday night, surrounded as I was by the great political minds of Meeja Wales. The self-proclaimed writer and broadcaster Withers was there, and we were joined by Dave "the suit" and "Marvellous" David. In fact, Smashy and I felt a bit out of place as the big discussion of our time began.
Here is an example of the kind of deep political insight we were forced to try to get our heads around - just in case we showed up our ignorance on all things Assembly and Parliamentary.
Withers began the big debate which, I must admit, wouldn't have looked out of place in the House of Commons, perhaps at PM's question time.
"Why on earth do people dunk biscuits in their tea?" he demanded of the honourable crew gathered around him.
"Because it tastes really good," intoned The Suit dismissively.
"I should say. Maaaaaarvellllous!" chimed in Marvellous David.
"But why would you put a biscuit, which is food, in your tea, which is drink?" said an uncomprehending Withers. "You don't mix food and drink like that. The biscuit will just fall apart!"
"Not if you use the right ones. Those digestives, they're maaaaarveelllous!" argued Marvellous David.
"I agree," said The Suit, carrying the air of a young Lloyd George as he looked at Withers as if there was a nasty whiff, probably of the wonderful one's sweaty armpits, under his nostrils. "You put sauce on your chips, don't you?"
"Well, yes, but that's different!" moaned Withers.
"How is it different?"
"Because it is. You wouldn't dream of drinking a bottle of sauce, would you?"
Now here was my chance to get involved in an intriguing discussion with men who, just by the power of thought, can bring countries to their knees, wars to an end and vanquish the threat of global warming.
"I once ate a whole spoonful of lime pickle," I revealed.
Silence.
I decided it was time to leave them to it.

At the weekend Wren visited and we went to see Wanted, the new film with James McAvoy and Angelina Jolie. I can't get used to these Saturdays off. You have to mix with that horrible breathing mass of slime known as the General Public.
The car park at the Red Dragon Centre down the Bay was packed. In the rain we had to leave Basil literally hundreds of yards away from the entrance then make a run for it. After that we had to queue at least 10 minutes to hand over 14 QUID! for two cinema tickets.
The film was ok if you like lots of blood and seeing in graphic detail a bullet pop out of a man's forehead in slow motion. Yuk! Plot was far fatched but I guess it was better than sitting in watching the rain come down. Mind you, for the sake of 14 quid...

On Sunday Wren had to work and I settled down for an afternoon of sport. First there was Lewis Hamilton's tremendous British Grand Prix victory in the rain at Silverstone, then the Wimbledon men's final that lasted six and a half hours off and on because of showers. Great match though as Rafael Nadal ended Roger Federer's run of five consecutive Wimbledon victories.

1 comment:

Jack Regan said...

Your Bourbon is the perfect dunking biscuit. Allow five seconds per dunk and the results are sublime.
Morning coffees, however, are the least perfect biscuit to dunk in one's tea / coffee. Allow a millisecond for a dunk and all you get is radioactive sludge.
I agree with both The Suit and Marvellous Dave that Digestives, too, are fine dunkers. However, having such a large circumference often leads to difficulties in dunking a whole one at once. Having to halve the biscuit halves the enjoyment. Clearly there was very little to do in the Shire when I was growing up.